It’s Tuesday morning, and you’ve got an early class. However, you’ve actually managed to emerge from a deep slumber on time, which is commendable since you and your snooze button have developed a pretty intense love-hate relationships this semester. You hop out of bed and start brewing the coffee while you take a nice, hot shower with your favorite gels and lotions.
You curl your hair and contemplate trying to perfect your winged eyeliner once again or to try for berry lips. Hell, you’ve got so much time on your hands, maybe you’ll even contour! You throw on that super cute outfit you thought of days ago and have been waiting for the perfect time to wear, and you’re on your merry way!
Class begins, you settle in your seat, and you’re ready to take on the day. Then, the comments start.
“Why are you so dressed up?”
“Why are you wearing so much makeup?”
“You’re not allowed to look this cute this early in the morning!”
It’s something that I’ve certainly encountered, and I’m sure others have as well. In a society that is so focused on outward appearances, why are girls who put a lot of effort into their looks typically shamed?
The irony is enough to make your head spin. The media is screaming at us to look a certain way, to carry ourselves a certain way, to be a certain way, but the moment we make an attempt to reach these standards, we’re suddenly trying too hard?
Dressing up every day, every couple of days, or not at all is your choice. Personally, it helps me feel confident. If I’m ever super anxious about a particular class, I like to set aside the time to do my hair and makeup and put on a nice outfit. It takes my mind off of the stress and makes me feel like I have some sort of control over scenarios that make me uncomfortable.
A lot of times, when people make a conscious effort to look good, they feel good. Why has shaming people for looking nice become such a popular fad? Insecurity. People feel like they’re not presenting their best selves, and so they choose to critique the appearances of others, particularly those who look like they’ve put in some effort, and attempt to belittle them for presenting their best self. But guess what?
Other people are not the ultimate authority on how you look. If the way a person chooses to present themselves makes them happy and confident, then who are you to say that the way they look is unacceptable? Don’t belittle others just because they feel good about themselves.
One of the more frequent comments I’ve heard is, “Ugh, you look so cute. You’re making the rest of us look bad.” Sister, I hate to break it to you…but the way I’m dressed has nothing to do with you. I decided to spruce up my look today because I felt like it, not because I wanted to “steal your thunder” or anything like that.
Dressing up is FUN! It’s fun to glam up, however often you please, and show the world who’s boss. And as long as you’re dressing for yourself and stylizing your appearance so it makes you happy, that all that matters. You shouldn’t have to apologize for looking the way you want to look.
The shaming needs to stop. We should focus our energies into creating a supportive community of kickass ladies. Once we stop focusing solely on outward appearances and start paying attention to what truly makes a person awesome, we’ll be able to focus on what really matters, accepting people as they are, for who they are.
What look makes you feel amazing?